God

"a letter to God"

was there a God? who am i to ask this question, im just an ordinary human being... but in this kind of situation im facing right now, sometimes we ask our self. was there really a god? i had a rough and tumble life, but not miserable in a sense. its just that i have things i cant decide which way to go. all the knowledge i have and the skills are stuck. and i feel, so empty. i'm 35years old but i have'nt achieved any. i was left behind by my classmates and friends. it sounds envious, but i envy no one. all i want is a good life for my family. i think i am a good man, a good friend, a good husband, a good father.

i have a beautiful family, they bring me joy each day i woke up. but i cant provide what is due for them. i dont have a stable job, i rely on my rackets sometimes none. good thing i have a sister who atleast financially support me and my family, without her, i am gone.

perhaps i will lose my sanity or to the extent end my life, but i think of my family. who will take care of them when i am gone, but if i am here i cant take care what is for them..............

the truth is i need a job, or a business, just to have money to support them....................

they say money is the source of all evil. but how can we live without money????

perhaps if it is illegal that will be evil....................................

my prayer:

God i praise your name... please takecare of my family in any harm, in any sickness.........please give me wisdom and courage to face this trials. reach me with your hand, touch me my lord and guide me always.

God i know you listen and i know your a loving god, thats why you gave your son to save the sins of the world. its just that i cant wait, god. i surrender my lord. take my wheel, i give it to you.......sorry if i question your authority. my lord i love you and i know you love me. help me my God.

your son,

rc